My friends always played a very important role in my life. I have been blessed with a couple of amazing friends throughout my adult life so far. With some we grew apart or we lost track of each other. I still think that those friendships were strong and real, regardless of the fact that they faded out. Today though I want to talk about the friends that are still in my life. To be even more specific, I want to talk about my female friends. I want to share with you some of the things I admire about the amazing women in my life.
I value quality over quantity, so I can tell you exactly how many friends I have at this point in my life. I have five. Five friends are more than enough. Two are in Greece. They are like sisters to me. I can not imagine my life without them. My other three friends are in the Netherlands. One has the official title of my best friend here and I also know her the longest. The other two are new mama friends, that I know for less than a year, but feel that could contact them any time during the day or night, in case I need too. Of course I also have people that I really like and hang out with from time to time, but I am quite strict when it comes to my definition of friendship, so yes, five.
When you have a daughter, you start thinking about the female people that you spend time with, as they will most likely be your daughters role models. And I feel pretty great about my choice of friends, despite the fact that ALL five of them will drop F* bombs, as if we are in WWII and their life depends on it. Here is why:
- My friends want to make a difference in the world. Through art or science or education or their way of life, they want to make this world a better place to live in. and I definitely want that for my daughter.
- My friends are as open-minded as they come. Sure, we might joke about you later on, if we don’t agree with your ideas, but they do keep their ears and souls open to new people and ideas. Racism and sexism have no place in their hearts. And not just in theory.
- My friends do stand their ground. As open-minded as they might be, they will not avoid conflict. If they feel you are a nasty human being with no respect for others, they will make sure you know. Or they will get you out of their life. My friends are not hypocrites.
- My friends know how to behave. Sure enough, those f* bombs that I mentioned before do make their appearance quite often, however every single one of my friends is more than capable to impress your parents or a boss. I feel that knowing how to behave in different situations is a valuable skill. Talking to my grandmother in a different way than you talk to me is not hypocrisy. It’s called good manners.
- My friends have hilarious stories to tell. I happen to be part of many of these stories, especially when it comes to my older friends. Why is that important? It is important to me because it is an indication of a person who lived and lives their life to the fullest and is able to make fun of themselves.
- My friends also have some pretty sad stories to share. I wish they didn’t but they do and maybe these stories also helped them become who they are. They all deal with the dark side of their life in different ways. Others hide their wounds so well, that it took me years to discover, while others are pretty open about it. What they all have in common is the grace with which they talk about the hard stuff in their lives. I really admire how they will never whine about the hardships, but will try and see how they affected their life in an attempt to become happier, better people.
- My friends admit their mistakes. What we all have in common is that we have made some pretty big ones. But learned from them. They are wise women, my friends.
- My friends don’t know it all. But they are willing to research and learn it all. I love how all of them, each one in their own unique way, will be passionately devoted to a subject and try and learn as much as they can about it.
- Two of my friends do sports. Like, actual sports, you know. I deeply admire that and since I am not the sporty type, I am really glad my daughter will have someone to inspire her to take care of her body in that way.
- None of my friends is a drama queen. Their use of wit and irony is remarkable. Bukowski said it best: “Style is the answer to everything”. When they go through hard times, they will find a way to make fun of their misfortunes.
- My friends are there for each other. Every. Single. Time. What’s more to ask? If Loulou is not there for her friends when she grows up, I will be super-pissed and feel that I failed as a mother.
I could go on and on, but I won’t, because it’s Sunday and Loulou wants me to play with her.
Are you proud of your own friends? If so, feel free to share in the comments what makes them special.